@FrozenSoldier is Awesome

I just wanted to take a minute to say Paula is fucking cool. She's made all my banners and you should follow her on Twitter and read her awesome stories. That is all.

 

She made me this. so...this is why I'm geeking out...again!

~Tay

I can haz Contests?

So I've decided that I need to make more fandom friends. And what better way to achieve that than to host a contest? Genius plan, I know!

Well, what some of you don't know is that I'm Team Jacob. *gasp!* I know, but I rarely read any of the stories and all of the new fandom friends I've made are either Team Edward or Team Jasper (more like Team Jackson on that one). But it doesn't matter; I have love for all the Twi-guys. That being said, I think I'm going to have a little Jacob contest. I'll post the contest rules, stipulations, blah blah on its own page marker and figure it out.

Now, what I need from you, friends, are Jacob fans because I need judges. Lots of eclectic judges because this is going to be anything goes, (slash, Blackwater, Asshole-cob, etc.) I want it all, AU/AH/Canon/Pedophile-with Ness only, of course- all of it!

And I'd love suggestions too. What do you want to see stories judged on? I have a few categories picked out with crazy names and all, but I know I'm a huge fan of AH so I can't be super objective when it comes to vamps and wolves.

Anyway, I think that's all so um, yea, let me know what you think?

~Tay

Worst. Blogger. Ever!

So I'm awful - I know - and I won't bullshit about RL (eventhough it's true) and I'll give you the scoop:

1) Didn't place in the Jasper's Darlin's contest. It's cool. I got the experience out of it. (and a one-shot that people actually like, crazy as that sounds)
2) I gotta update this whole damn blog!
3) Go do this contest hosted by Gem Awards and TwiWrite 'cause they're awesome.

That is all... for now.

~Tay

Feeling like a Pimp!

I'm so effin' excited right now. I finally got my story The Befuddlement of Jasper Whitlock validated on Twilighted.net!! Check it out if you haven't already. The tense errors in the FFn version are finally fixed so it reads a lot smoother.

That's all I've got really...

Kthxbai!

O

Once again, this fuck-tastical banner made by the awesomeness that is @FrozenSoldier

~Tay

Voting closes tomorrow!

Voting for "The Many Faces of Jasper" Contest hosted by Jasper's Darlins closes tomorrow so get your voting in A.S.A.P.. There are many great stories to read by so many amazing authors. FrozenSoldier (AKA Lonely_Soldier) as well as CharliDenae have stories submitted (just to name-drop a few great Jalice writes). I suggest you take the time to make this contest awesome. I'll even walk you through the steps:

First: Read the AWESOME ENTRIES on the FF(dot)net C2
Second: CAST YOUR VOTE for your favorite story
Third: Pimp your favorite story on Twitter or your blogspot or where ever. Show the authors that they are appreciated!

And since this is my blog, I will now shamelessly pimp my own story! Read it! Nao!

Fuck-awesome-tastical banner made by the amazing @FrozenSoldier

The Befuddlement of Jasper Whitlock by reluctantreader

Shameful, I know. =)

~Tay

Marriage: In All Its Splendor update!

Banner so graciously made by the awesome @FrozenSoldier

Chapter 5: Bieber and Beer

Carlisle just chuckles it up as he always does. He may be ten years our senior, but he never seems to get tired of us. He says our shenanigans are "constant entertainment."

Edward just gives Emmett his signature girly stink-eye which really only looks like a cross between a scowl and a pout. He looks even more like a pussy. I really don't even know why we've hung out with him all these years; he's such a moody little bitch.

He finally says, "I'll throw in Truth and a copy of Throbbin' Hood: Prince of Beaves," and the fucker has the nerve to look excited about it!

"Oh, come the fuck on, Cullen!" Emmett bellows as I groan and Carlisle stifles another fucking chuckle, almost choking on his beer. "No one wants to watch your PG-13, soft core bullshit!" he continues.

I agree and Edward looks at us like we're insane.

"What? It's got a pretty accurate story line," he defends. And because we're gaping at him like he's a total fucking moron – because he is – he adds under his breath, "and the acting's pretty good, too," like it fucking matters.

Emmett looks completely gob smacked, but I just shake my head and avert my eyes. No one watches porn for an "accurate story line" or "good acting."

…sometimes, I really wonder about that boy…

~Tay

Oh, for the love of contests!

I added a contest tab to let y'all know what's going on in the fandom. F.W.C. has a complete list (since, ya know, that's their entire blog) but I'll just be posting some that really pique my interest. I won't be entering all of them, though. As much as I love a good challenge, most of the time I end up with ridiculous *headdesk* or *facepalm*

~Tay

A new review

Check out how I feel about Tattoos Like Mile Markers by casket4mytears:


Posted: December 2, 2010, 2:22AM
I'm currently working my way through Tattoos Like Mile Markers by casket4mytears over on Twilighted. It's a beautiful story, really, it's just impossible for me to get through right now. I don't know if it's because I've struggled with depression, or the simple fact that casket is wordier than even I, but it is taking up so much of my time. The saddest part is that I'm only on chapter twelve and it has been four days since I've started it. The story is only up to about thirty-five chapters. That's usually nothing for me; I've read stories much longer, in less time, and all while I watch my fifteen month old son all day long.

Please don't get me wrong; this story is beautiful. That writing is very floral and flourishing. The love between two broken souls is crushing and magnificent. And the lemons...Jesus Christ, the lemons!! There are no words for how steamy and delicious they truly are. Yum.

I guess I should say what it's about, huh? Well, here goes: Tattoos Like Mile Markers was originally supposed to be a One-Shot for a contest. Due to popular demand - and the fact that Edward and Bella had so much depth for only a few thousand words - casket4mytears continued on with the ride. The story starts off with Bella in a group therapy session she is forced to attend by Charlie after she attempts to kill herself six months prior by suffocating on the exhaust of her truck in the garage. I'm not exactly sure how long she's been in the group, but on this particular day, the handsome recluse of the group decides he's going to speak for the first time since she's arrived. (I'm guessing it's a few months.) Turns out that our pissed off person is the handsome and troubled Edward Cullen. Edward ends up storming out after a tirade only to have Bella agree with him and follow suit. They exchange some banter - dubbing each other Bitchella and Doucheward - and go their separate ways only to end up bumping into one another at a bar in Port Angeles. Turns out our bitchy Bella is a tattoo apprentice and her boss is the main artist of Edward. After a few drinks and a hilarious fight between said tattoo artist - Ronan - all the deliciousness of a lemon comes out to play.

Now, this is where the story was supposed to end. Fortunately for us, it doesn't happen. The tale is a complex spiderweb of self loathing, self mutilation, abandonment issues run ramped, lemons, and then there's also suicide every where.

"“I need air. I'll be back,” Edward insisted, throwing open the door with a bang.

His mind raced in fifty directions as he stumbled down the hall, his hands shaking as adrenaline seized the reins. He couldn't stay here, not now; upstairs, nestled in a secret stash in his former room, he knew of three bottles filled with various benzodiazepines and narcotics, and he could not be anywhere near them. He had a duty now, a promise to uphold to Bella. He owed Alice better than an encore performance. Eyes. Too many eyes in this house."

It seems that everyone has a hidden suicide somewhere or knows someone who has either attempted and failed or attempted and succeeded.

"Edward nodded, scarcely managing to whisper his thanks.  Bella looked to Alice, who'd begun to tear up anew, Jasper wrapping his arms about her from behind, swaying her gently side to side.  Carlisle stepped into the aisle and embraced the couple, a private exchange of words occurring with the parents of the girl he'd had to pronounce dead, and Edward's focus turned back to Bella.  His wild eyes and troubled expression terrified her.

It was how she looked when she'd decided to park her truck in the garage."

Oh yea, and there's a murder in there too, but that's at the beginning and you need to figure it out for yourself. If your a lover of dark themes, this is all for you; go for it. There's even some music woven in for those of you who love "band" stories. No, Bella nor Edward are not in a band, but of course they are musically inclined. (Edward's tasty fingers are too long not to be attached to an instrument.)  

TLMM has a lot of lyrics and there's even some poetry. Humor comes in the form of snark and banter and a super hyper-active Alice, as well as Edward's primal hatred of all things Rosalie.

"“Hello, Edward. Come to regale us with your torment of the doctor?”

“Hello, Rosalie. Come to torture us with your incessant need to plan the most expensive wedding in the history of Forks?” Edward grumbled back, “Maybe if you get that nose job, you'll finally top the mayor's shindig.”

“Fuck you,” Rosalie snarled, rolling her eyes, “My nose is regal, like Princess Diana.”

“And so's your bulimia,” Edward snorted as his brother sauntered in from the kitchen..."

There's Glee and Twitter and, most importantly, self-discovery. It truly is a wonderful love story and I suggest everyone take the time to read it.

~Tay

Well, This is new...

I've never before in my life had a blog, so bear with me here, folks. I'll try to get all of this background and fun-time stuff situated, then I'll actually post something of sustenance. Until then, this is pretty much all I've got. I hope I don't disappoint you guys too much!

~Tay